But most fights in For Honor are these stonking 8-person gankfests of a point-capturing Dominion game. WHY? I understand that relying on the player’s connections to host a fight makes sense in a duel. Peer to peer notworkingĪlmighty Yggdrasil, we’re in! An actual fight! Okay, let’s go capture point C and take a swing at this big guy with an axe. I’ve been staring down the enemy in this loading screen for four full minutes now. Can you win fights just by looking angry? Let’s get everyone pumped up with some ‘GLHF’s and encouraging shouts of “VALHALLA!” I’ll just press ‘T’ and… nope. This is where the two groups stand off and stare each other down. Press ‘T’ to chat but also maybe not chatĪll right! We’ve hit the loading screen finally. Find me a goddamn table, you massive jerk. Just keep a little circle spinning in the corner or something. If that one is full, do the same thing again. If a match is full, move on and find us a new one. “You cannot join this session because it is full” is a message nobody should ever see. This is like a restaurant host taking you to a packed table in the corner and saying: “Oh no, there’s a family of five already here!” Then picking you up and carrying you back to the entrance before plonking you down at the threshold and saying: “Oh hi!” as if he’d never seen you before.
But not For Honor - it likes to send you all the way back to the main menu. You might easily assume at this point that the game will just auto-slot you back into matchmaking. If this match is full then why did you even try and put me into it? Okay, okay, maybe it just filled up while we weren’t looking. “ You cannot join this session because it is full” The game has slapped you with a message saying. Then go back to the game and everything is ready to go.
What you can do here is alt-tab out of the game and refresh Facebook a few dozen times. There’s no loadout menu, no tinkering with armour or skills, no inspecting your stats, no revolving a character model and considering whether or not to make their shoulderpads pink. When you go into the queues it says “matchmaking started” but what that really means is “sit there and do nothing while I look for chumps”. How in the name of the Pope did so much trash get through testing? Here is a rundown of how an evening with this medieval swordfest might go, which handily doubles as a list of all the things Ubisoft needs to fix. Victory has never felt so dirty.īut its matchmaking is a toxic dumpster fire and its user menus are a bubonic plague of mistakes and dumbfounding decisions.
You can be down to your last sliver of health, limping across a bridge like a deflated balloon and you still might manage to grab a giant knight in panic and throw him off the ledge. The menage-a-trois of murder and mayhem that is For Honor does a lot of things very well.
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